Before I realized that today, June 2, was hashtag blackouttuesday on the internet I had made the decision to take a break from social media until July. Some part of me feels like I am just jumping on a bandwagon I did not know exist. Another part of me thinks people will see this as an extension of another internet trend which is MUTED. It seems like quite a few businesses this week are “muting” themselves in order to ” listen, learn and amplify black voices and stories”. I am taking this break for neither of these reasons.
I am taking a break because I am tired. And I am tired of being tired. Every. Single. Post. In my feed is about racism and “listening to our black brothers and sisters” and it is exhausting. It is exhausting because I know this will not last. This is just a phase; a passing gesture much like the February celebration of Black History Month. It feels like on the internet this is just a time for white people to say – LOOK I AM NOT RACIST! LOOK WHAT I AM DOING FOR YOU! I AM SUPPORTING YOU!
This is not a decision I made lightly because I am someone who grew up with the internet. I toyed with the idea all day yesterday. But then, as I was trying to casually scroll my IG feed I came across a post that almost quite literally took my breath away…
Hopefully you see I am not trying to specifically call this person out, or the other people who liked this post. But I am sorry, who in f**k does this chick thinks she is?! What is this “extensive training and knowledge on issues of race and systemic racism in our country (and the world)”?? I started typing so many different responses to this before I just landed on “who exactly is this??” What I blocked out here is a picture of a white woman and I pursume her white husband – it appeared to be a wedding photo.
She is right though, it is not my job to educate anyone on race. But I am happy to do so. I would rather share my experiences in order for other people to learn. I do thank her for her seemingly nice gesture…. but maannnnnnn…… I get the whole #whiteprivilege thing. Scrolling through her page I go no hint or suggestion that she knows ANYTHING about race relations in the States, let alone other countries aside from a few books I hope she read and not just posted pictures of.
For a few hours after asking “who exactly is this??” I waited for a response. I never got one. But when I woke up this morning I got a simple “It’s me!” response. Nothing else. I can tell she saw absolutely nothing wrong with what she wrote. She really feels like she is a source of information on race. She can tell people what they can do to help right now. I don’t think my husband would make such a bold statement after being married to a black woman and having black in-laws for almost 14-years. Even when talking to my husband sometimes, I don’t think he gets it…. but this seemingly random woman does….
There was nothing I could comment on this post that would not come off as argumentative. And I really don’t need the drama so I left it alone. I unfollowed her. I am BEING BETTER. I took the high road instead of roasting the shit out of this woman for having the balls to say such a thing. This is not a college course; a lesson in school to be learned with third party resources.
All these folks that are muting and blacking out on Tuesday don’t realize they need to simply NOT be the Amy Coopers of the world.
I’ll come back in July when this has passed. Because it will pass. It always does. These things never stay in the media for long. Americans and the media have ADD. They cannot focus on anything for any extended period of time. I’ll still be reading and updating my blog and goodreads. But I simply cannot be on social media right now. Getting it from all sides… BLM and then Cops trying to prove they are not racist or the bad guys – that the action of one cop does not make them all bad (which is true). It is just too much and I know I need a break so I will take it.