I’m combining two books on this one: stop self-sabotaging your life because you haven’t discovered what you want to do in life at 18. Both audiobooks. Boom.
LATE BLOOMERS. There is this idea that we are supposed to come out of high school at 17, 18 or even 19 years old and know what we want to do with the rest of our lives. At 35 years old, and a parent, I realize how silly that idea is. I don’t even know what I want to be when I grow up. How can I expect my son or daughter in a few years to know what they want to do for the next 50-years.
I wish I could remember where I found this book. Maybe it just popped up on my Scribd app and I thought it sounded interesting.
While there is the pressure to know what you want to do for the rest of your life at 18 years of age, there is an even bigger pressure to succeed early in life. I think this mindset is mostly attributed to the internet and social media. It saddens me when I see a 5-year old with their own Instagram page and following (managed by mom in the bio). Like why are we trying to have children become internet celebrities before they even figure out who they are and what they actually are into. I can tell you right now what I’m into now is not what I was into ten years ago, let alone 20 years ago.
So not only do we need to send our kids to the best pre-schools, enroll them in the most extracurricular activities, make sure they get the best tutors to get those perfect SAT scores but they also need to be internet famous before going off to college to study something they most likely will not follow through with in four years.
Late Bloomers caters to those of us that seem to never bloom. Those of us that are still trying to figure out what we want to be what we grow up. Those of us that don’t match media’s definition of success which causes us to feel left out. There are several examples throughout the book of people who did not bloom until later in life. The real problem is that there will always be someone who is doing it faster, quicker and younger. And even the people that we look to as “early bloomers”, if you ask them, they will say they are late to the party themselves.
Stop Doing That Shit. I love Gary John Bishop. Now that I got that out of the way, when you hear about self-sabotaging, I don’t know about you but I think about all the made for TV movies that I have watched. The drug addicted family member. The bad boyfriend or girlfriend you keep going back to. Dropping out of High School. That’s not what this book is out. This book is about the dumb shit we do every day that keeps us from doing the shit we know we should be doing. The dumb shit that holds us back. The dumb shit that controls our lives.
So many people like to point fingers. They like to blame others for their misfortunes. So many people carry the past with them throughout their life and use it as crutch as to why they can’t do something; or why they are the way we are. Gary Bishop says no, you are the problem and the solution. I know a lot of tragic stuff happens to a lot of people and it is sad and it is unfortunate, but Bishop says you can’t use that as an excuse. You have the choice to change your life around.
There is an excellent analogy about a sponge. It has been said that kids are like sponges, soaking up anything that is out there. That does not change just because we transition from kids to adults. We are what we pretend to be.
Bishop also teaches his readers about perspective. We only know the truth from our perspective. So stop assuming shit. You don’t know. That’s another great story I don’t want to spoil for anyone.
Stop talking about other people it’s a distraction from owning and changing your own life. We are the nature of what we talk about. Gossip is not harmless or funny. When you indulge in gossip you become a human being who gets off on throwing under human beings under the bus.
I picked up this book not really thinking I was going to get much from it. I did not think I was holding myself back, let alone sabotaging my life. After listening to this book I realized I was actually doing a lot without even realizing it. Actually, I was not doing much – which is the point.
It doesn’t matter what you do, it only matters that you do. You can’t find the pathway by standing still.
Yes, I read these back to back (not on purpose) and it worked for me. I am finding myself in a position in life where I am not sure what is next. I feel like I “messed up” somewhere along the way and I am not sure how to get back onto the path so many people seem to already be on. These two books, together, made me realize I am on my own path and if I just keep forging ahead I will find my way even if I have no clue what that is yet.