Why am I doing this?

And what I mean by that is, why am I talking to myself/complete strangers on the internet.

Because I feel like I am just talking to myself anyway.

I was reminded of this last night when I was walking to my mother. A nightly ritual.

I was telling her about my day, what was bothering me about work, etc., etc., etc.

I was met with a random uh huh, okoh well.

Thanks for the talk ma. I get the same kind of response from other people when I just try talking to them about something that interests me. Or even when I try answering THEIR questions. I expect a little more from a loved one.

When I try talking to someone about something I am interested in pursuing, you know, looking for the encouragement… I don’t get it. I either get a response of why it won’t work or a million questions that make me question why I would even want to do this, to begin with. Or my absolute favorite response, cool.

I would rather you tell me I am crazy then just say cool. 

I embrace being called crazy, or weird. Those labels to me tell me that I am doing something right. I am doing something someone else can not do. I am doing what someone is afraid to do.

When I get a one-word response like that (to me) just means you’re not that interested. You could care less. And most importantly, that you really do not think I can do it.

We share our ideas and thoughts and dreams with people so we can get encouragement. So when we can get support.

For me, when that does not happen I kind of shut down. I don’t want to talk about what excites me to “you” anymore.

This is why I will talk to strangers (mostly myself) on the internet.

Why do you blog?

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