Conditional Dreams

I have been fortunate in the last few years to encounter people who know what they want to be when they grow up.

The older I get, the more envious of those people I get.

I am 34 years old and I have no clue what I want to do with my life. Which is not really a surprise because I remember being a kid in school and when the obnoxious task of sharing what you want to do when you grow up came up I would just lie and say I wanted to be a doctor. Never was the case. I just wanted the person asking the question to move on to the next person.

I am not one of those women who wanted to be a mom, or a wife. I do not particularly enjoy these roles I play… it is really hard. I certainly never had any plan to be a dispatcher – I just kind of fell into all those roles.

What honestly surprises me though is that these people with their dreams… they’re conditional. Is that really what you want to do then?

Maybe I am naive because I have no big dream, career wise, but I always thought if you got a real opportunity to  do what you want to do…. why would you not do it? Even if the path is less than ideal.

To say you’ll only continue down that path if certain things happen…. whack. Those people don’t impress me. Those people are worse off then I am. They’re chasing someone else’s life. Someone else’s dream. They only want it if it looks like it does from the outside.

These people I refer to are adults. So there are kids and bills involved. So I understand not “being able to” start from scratch. Not being able to take the pay cut to completely fulfill that dream. At this point in my life, taking a pay cut would not be an option, even if I knew what I wanted to do.

If you have a dream. Do the damn thing. Chase it. Become it.

It is also okay if you have no dream at all. But please, don’t live in the space in between. Some of us are rooting for you to do exactly what you want to do.

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